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(這篇文章特別獻給我敬愛的 Bill Knight。中文版載於英文版之後。)

To my beloved Bill Knight. 

For me, apple pie brings a very special and sweet memory.

I always remember Bill ----
the old man who was so lovely, so sweet, so happy, and so optimistic, and apparently did not look old at all.

I never knew Bill before, but he walked me through my hardest time when I ended my first love.

His life was full of sunshine and had encouraged me to move on and embrace the brightness.

 

It was the year when I graduated from the University.

It was the day I submitted my last academic paper, that I put an end to my irredeemable relationship.

Leaving was too difficult, so I chose to take a large leap.

I exiled myself to the Southern Hemisphere, desperate to leave my shattered world.

I prayed that the strangeness of a new country and the unfamiliarity of a second language could pause the grief.

 

There was a host mother in her 60s living in Melbourne receiving overseas students.

Betty's house was full of guests so I was introduced to her boyfriend, Bill.

 

Bill drank coffee like water, reheated bacons in the microwave oven as all-time snacks, slashed loads of butter on his toasts, and smoked packs and packs of cigarettes.

Watching me eating in such a careful and disciplined manner,
and hearing my Chinese way of chattering of a healthier life,
Bill broke into laughter and said brightly,

"What's the point? Fat or thin is not decided by how you eat! It's in your genes!
 My children's mom is big and fat.
 My children give up butter, give up fatty meat, eat lots of veggies, and they are big and fat!
 Me? I eat fatty meat, drink full cream milk, and spread butter on my toasts for decades! See I am still thin!
 And, I am in my 70s now, it's not too far from death, what is the point of giving up delicious things?
 If I can't have them from now on, I would rather die now! Hahahaha!"

Well it was making sense.

The generousity and openness was like a ray of sun. It gleamed in my heart.

 

In the second evening of my arrival, Bill drove me to Betty's house and we had dinner together.

They were confused to find that I travelled such a distance and did not have any plans.

I told them the reason why I flew half a globe.
The tears I had been holding back all the way overflew.

Betty held me in her arms. "Will I survive?" I wept in despair.

"Of course you will. Of course you will." said Betty, patting me gently.

I continued to fight back the loneliness and endure the pain with all my might in the days followed.

Bill did not speak much.
But when we were driving through wide fields one day and I was gazing out of the window, he suddenly spoke,

"At least you are trouble-free now."

He would never know the power of that small sentence.

I walked on my life remembering these words of wisdom.
When I was attacked by bitter yearnings and traumatic memories,
I was strong again with this reminder.


We had been living together for nearly 2 weeks.

We took our meals together, went grocery shopping at the supermarket, watched the TV, and were each other's dancing partner at Bill's social dance class.

So many pieces of memory, all precious and unforgettable----

I remember the photos he took, the coins he collected.

I remember him showing me a large map of Melbourne in the first night of my arrival, pointing at different places.

I remember the spacious room he prepared for me, and the guitar, mirror, and electrical heater inside.

I remember he managed to get me a thick jacket, as I forgot it was winter in the Southern Hemisphere.

I remember he brought me to many places in his red old car.

I remember him driving me to Betty's home, so I could eat and chat and play cards with international students.

I remember him taking me to a wood with numerous birds, and how he looked when he fed them.

I remember he and Betty prepared a picnic lunch then drove me to find a horse-riding course, as I loved riding so much.

I remember the zoos, the city centre, the supermarkets he brought me to visit.

I remember him taking many photos of me playing. The photos are proofs of happy moments in times of life's darkness.

I remember he said to me "You must have stuffed animals all over your bed at your home."
When I was in surprise and asked "How do you know that?" wide-eyedly, he laughed,"Ha! Ha!" and replied,"Everyone can imagine."

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And I remember him teaching me to make apple pie.

One day Bill came back with a batch of green apples.
He poured them into the kitchen sink, threw me a peeler, and let me peel the dozen of fruits.

At that time, I was a pathetic fellow who did not even know how to peel an apple.

I used to use a small knife to peel at home, but even with that I was extra unskilful and would cut away quite some amount of apple flesh with the skin.

And a peeler was a strange new thing.

Looking at the hard green fruits lying in the freezing cold water, I was a bit blank.

But the numbness from my trauma helped.

I took a deep breath and started intently.

One by one, one by one, and one by one......

The peeler slid and hit my finger. I checked ---- no cuts ---- then carried on.

Then one by one, one by one, and one by one, I finished all.

No complaining about coldness, or pain, or boredom, or difficulty,
I quietly and tranquilly lived with my grief and complete my task.

I always recall this apple-peeling scene in the following days and years.

All the tiny experiences pushed me to grow and mature gradually.

I hope Bill would be happy for me, and proud of me.

I hope he knew he had inspired me so much.

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On the day I left, Betty and Bill hugged me goodbye.

Bill lifted me up and said, "Why, you haven't gained any weight!"

As Betty said, how many times in one's life can she visit the same place? Very probably once in a lifetime.

I turned back from the car carrying me away and waved at them.

What a beautiful encounter.

Bill had been a very important person in my course of growing up.

The numerous happy scenes healed my heart soundlessly.

 

Many years have passed by and I miss him like always.

I have become a diligent cook now and everytime I make pies I deeply miss Bill. 

When I share my pies with my friends I tell them this heart-touching story of mine.

Thank you Bill, for being an angel in my life.

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Bill knew how to make delicious things in the simplest way.

In his eyes, pies were good because they were easy and quick and convenient and tasty,
and one is enough for several meals.

Bill made apple pies very efficiently----

1. Peel, core, and dice the apples.
    Cook them in a pot of water with whatever amount of suger, until sweet and softened.
    Drain the apples.
2. Thaw 2 pieces of frozen puff pastries.
3. Spray oil in a tin, lay 1 piece of pastry into it. Add apples.
    Cover with another piece of pastry. press the edges.
4. Apply egg brush. Bake.

Done.

Unbelievable!

Bacon egg and cheese pies (Lorraine pie?) were even easier!

1. Cook bacons in the microwave oven.
2. Thaw 2 pieces of frozen puff pastries.
3. Spray oil in a tin, lay 1 piece of pastry into it. Add bacons, eggs, and cheese.
    Cover with another piece of pastry. press on the edges.
4. Apply egg brush. Bake.

Done again.

Using this method we can make unlimited kinds of pies.

I have loved using frozen puff pastry since then. Another thing Bill inspired me.

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This Apple Pie is dedicated to my beloved Bill.



Classic Apple Pie 經典蘋果派 

Inspired by Bill / 食譜來源:Bill 早年的啟發 + 小黑貓後來的製派經驗~

*切勿直接轉載圖文及食譜~ 如需分享請註明出處~!

Ingredients / 材料:
For the crust / 派皮部份——
All purpose flour ......100g 中筋麵粉......100克
Butter......50g / 奶油......50克
Salt......a pinch / 鹽......1小撮
Sugar......2 Tablespoons / 砂糖......2湯匙
Cold water......1~2 Tablespoons冷水......1~2湯匙
For the filling / 內餡部份——
Apples......3~4 pcs / 蘋果......3~4顆
Sugar......6 Tablespoons / 砂糖......6湯匙
Butter 奶油......1 Tablespoon
Cinnamon......1 teaspoon / 肉桂粉......1茶匙
For garnish / 頂面部份——
Egg......1/2 pc / 雞蛋......1/2顆
Water......1 teaspoon / 水......1茶匙

* As I have been posting a lot of recipes using frozen puff pastry already, 
   this time I decided to make a classic shortcrust pastry from the scratch!
   由於已經寫過很多使用冷凍千層酥皮的食譜,又由於很想用費心的方式向 Bill 致敬,
   這裡由原材料開始手工製作最傳統的酥鬆甜餅皮。

* Green apples (like Granny Smith) are common species for pies,
   but many other species of apples work too! I used Fuji this time.
   做派餡用的蘋果通常會選用較硬較酸的青蘋果 (如Granny Smith品種)。
   但很多不同品種的蘋果其實也可以 (只是口感各不同)~ 我這裡用富士蘋果~



Method / 做法:

For the filling / 內餡部份——
Peel the apples (pic. 1), remove the cores and dice (pic. 2).
Put apple into a small pot with sugar and butter, cook on medium heat (pic. 3).
When the apple turns soft, add cinnamon (pic. 4).
Continue to stir and cook until apple is golden and sauce is thick (pic. 5 & 6). Cool.
蘋果去皮 (圖一),去芯,切丁 (圖二),放入鍋中,加入
砂糖、奶油,中火拌煮 (圖三)。
煮至蘋果柔軟後,加入肉桂粉 (圖四)。繼續拌煮,至蘋果金黃、湯汁濃稠 (圖五、六)。放涼。蘋果批1.jpg

Tips / 小黑貓嘮嘮叨叨:
Apple may look dry at the beginning but juices will release soon. Do not need to add water.
     一開始煮的時候蘋果會看似很乾,但很快就會釋出果汁。請不要加水。
Enough sugar guarantees the finished apple filling to be thick and glossy.
     Apple juice cannot thicken if there is a lack of sugar.
     砂糖的份量要足夠,蘋果餡最終才能煮出濃稠、光澤的派餡質感;
     沒有糖的話果汁不會因加熱而變稠。

Bill's straight-forward way for the Filling / Bill 的簡單直接法:
Cook the apple in a large pot of boiling water with sugar until soft, then drain.
煮沸一鍋水,倒入蘋果丁和糖,煮至蘋果變軟,倒掉糖水。




For the crust 派皮部份——
Beat the egg. Sift the all purpose flour. Cut the butter into small cubes and keep them cold.
Add butter into flour (pic. 1), use a spoon or cold finger tips to work the butter into the flour (pic. 2 & 3).
Finished state should be pale yellow and breadcrumb-like (pic. 4).
Add sugar and salt (pic. 5), mix well. Add cold water a little at a time, until a dough is formed (pic. 6). 
Rest the dough for 30 minutes in the fridge, wrapped with plastic film (pic. 7).
Take out the dough, roll it into 3mm thick (pic. 8).
Line the pastry into a greased pan, cut away excessive sides, poke some holes with a fork (pic. 9).
中筋麵粉過篩;雞蛋打散;奶油切成小丁,保持冷凍。

奶油丁加入麵粉中 (圖一),以湯匙尖或手指尖將奶油揉入麵粉中 (圖二、圖三)。
揉好的奶油麵粉呈淺黃色麵包粉狀 (麵包糠) (圖四)。加入砂糖和
鹽 (圖五),拌勻。
逐少加入冷水,直至麵團成形 (圖六)。包好保鮮紙,放入冰箱冷藏30分鐘 (圖七)。
取出麵團,擀壓成3mm厚 (圖八)。烤盤刷油,鋪上麵皮,切去多餘邊緣,用叉子刺出小孔 (圖九)。
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Tips / 小黑貓嘮嘮叨叨:
Make sure everything stays cold (butter, fingers, spoon...) and quick when practicing the "Rub-in" method.
     If the butter melts the pastry loses its shortness.
     操作「揉入法」時,記得一切保持低溫並快速處理;若奶油融化,派皮就不會酥鬆。
Only add just enough water to barely bind the dough together.
     The lesser the liquid, the shorter the texture.
     冷水不用加完,麵團僅能成團即可;愈少液體,派皮的口感愈酥鬆。
Sprinkle flour on work surface, rolling pin, and palms, to avoid sticking.
     擀壓的時候工作桌、擀麵棍、雙手都可以灑一些麵粉防黏。
Poking holes on the pastry helps it to cook evenly and prevents it to expand and swell in the middle.
     用叉子於麵皮上刺孔,一來能令派皮受熱均勻,二來派皮不會膨脹,底部拱起。

Bill's straight-forward way for the Crust / Bill 的簡單直接法:

Buy frozen puff pastry. Take them out from freezer. Thaw.
直接買即成的冷凍酥皮。從冷凍庫取出。退冰。



Gather the remaining pastry and work into a dough, roll out again, and cut into stripes (pic. 1).
Spoon the cooled apple filling into the pie (pic. 2).
Take the 2 longest stripes and place them on the pie like a cross (pic. 3).
Place the remaining stripes one at a time and braid them (pic. 4).
Use a fork to press the seam around the edge (pic. 5). Mix the egg with water and brush on top.
Bake in a preheated oven at 200 degrees Celscius for 20~30 minutes or until golden (pic. 6). 
剩下的派皮聚合成團,再次擀平,切出長條 (圖一)。冷卻了的蘋果餡填入派中 (圖二)。
取兩條最長的麵皮,在派面正中處劃出十字 (圖三)。逐條麵皮鋪上,一邊編織成藤籃式樣 (圖四)。

邊緣的接口用叉子按壓封好 (圖五)。雞蛋打散,加水拌勻,以小刷子塗在編好的麵皮上。
送入已預熱200度C的烤箱,烤20~30分鐘,或至金黃 (圖六)。
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Tips / 小黑貓嘮嘮叨叨:
You can also divide the dough into 2 parts (about 1/3 and 2/3),
     use the larger dough for pie crust, and smaller one of stripes.
     也可以預先把麵團分成兩份 (約1/3與2/3的大小);大的一份用作派皮,小的一份用作長條麵皮。
Make sure the apple filling is complete cooled before spooning into the pie,
     or else it would melt the pastry.
     蘋果餡一定要冷卻之後才填入,否則會使派皮融化。



Serve warm. It is just too delicious.

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What's warmer is the memory in my heart .

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----------------------------------中文版 Chinese Version---------------------------------------

蘋果批於我,意義特殊而深刻。
我總是記得 Bill——那個樂天快活、可愛可親、看上去明明不老的老先生。
Bill 與我素昧平生,卻陪我度過了初戀終結之後最傷痛的時光。
他也以他充滿陽光的生命,勉勵了我,重新上路,擁抱美好。

那一年我大學畢業,
呈交最後一篇論文的那天,我把我那已然無法挽救的戀愛停止。
離開是那樣的困難,我只好身體力行,
把自己放逐南半球,在另一個世界裡生活一陣子。

我寄望在陌生的國度裡、全新的街道上、另一種語言中,
暫時停止慣常世界中的哀傷。



轉折之下,聯絡到墨爾本一位六十多歲的寄住家庭阿姨,
阿姨的房間全滿了學生,於是把我介紹給她七十多歲的男朋友,Bill。
就是這樣,我住進Bill的家。

Bill拿咖啡當水喝,把煙肉放微波爐叮熱當小吃,牛油吃很多,香煙吸不少。
我用中國式的苦口婆心規勸伯伯,伯伯看著飲食小心謹慎的我,開懷笑說:
「肥和瘦,才不是靠飲食決定的呢,它在你的基因裡!!
我孩子們的媽媽是大胖子,我的子女戒吃牛油、戒吃肥肉、猛吃蔬菜,結果還是大胖子。
我全脂奶照喝、肥肉照吃、牛油照塗,幾十年了,還不是這個樣子嗎?
再說呀,我都這把年紀了,死了也都差不多是時候了,還戒什麼?
你要我戒口不吃,我還不如現在死了,哈哈哈哈!!!」
想一想,倒又是很對的。而這份豁達舒懷,如陽光一縷,照進我心。



到埗的第二個晚上,Bill載我到Betty家一起吃晚飯。
我這個旅人,來了澳洲卻居然完全沒有想過要看什麼做什麼,兩老大表困惑。
我告訴了他們我飛來澳洲的原委。一路克制的眼淚,不可收拾。
Betty將痛哭的我環抱著,我在她懷內絕望哭叫:「Will I survive?」
那份痛楚和孤獨無法忘記,直到現在寫起,眼睛仍然潮熱。

那一夜過後,我繼續用盡九牛二虎之力抵抗寂寞,忍耐痛楚。
Bill沒有太多安慰的話。只是有一次,他在開車我在看窗,他忽然一句:
「At least you are trouble-free now.」
那一句話的力量,絕對是他自己不知道的。
往後的日子,每次傷痛來襲,思念苦苦的折磨人,
我一想起這句話,立刻就強壯起來;腦海中忽然就想得起,分手前的時光是那樣的為難。



那接近兩個星期的相處中,我們一起吃飯、逛超市、看電視、跳舞。
腦海中的片段,實在很多很多,而每段都又珍貴又難忘。

我記得他拍攝的照片、收藏的硬幣。
我到達的第一晚,他展示一張大型的墨爾本地圖,指給我看各個地方。
我記得他給我預備的大房間。
他為我張羅了一件冬天的大衣,因為我忘了南半球正值嚴冬。
我記得他把我載到他紅色的老舊車子中,帶我四處去。
也把我載去Betty家中,與一眾留學生一起吃晚餐打橋牌談天說地。
我記得他帶我去一個充滿雀鳥的樹林,我記得他喂鳥的樣子。
我喜歡騎馬,於是Bill和Betty準備好野餐食物,與我一起找馬場去。
我記得他帶我去動物園、市中心、超級市場。
他說,我家中一定滿床都是毛毛動物。我驚喜的問他怎麼知道,他哈一聲,說誰都想像得到。



我還記得,他教我做蘋果批。

那一天,他把買回來的一公斤青蘋果倒在廚房水槽中,又拋來一隻刨刀,叫我把那十來個蘋果削了。
天知道,大學時代的我,是一個連蘋果皮都不會削的傢伙。
在家裡,我只會用小把的尖頭水果刀笨拙地連皮帶肉切下來,而且還慢得沒命。
用刨來削果皮,沒試過。

看著那十多個硬邦邦的青蘋果,在寒冷無比的水槽中躺著,有點啞口無言。
可是,分手的麻木讓我把心一橫——再也沒有人會呵呵疼疼的了。
何況,沒有旅遊計劃的我,天長日久的也沒事幹——
於是執起刨刀,專心致志地認真削蘋果。

一個、一個、一個又一個……
有一下——刀刃刺到指頭上——看看沒事,又繼續削。
然後一個、一個、一個又一個,把蘋果全部削完。

沒有喊冷,沒有喊痛,沒有喊悶,沒有喊太難;
安安靜靜的,與哀傷共處,做好手上的事。

我經常的回想起削蘋果的一幕,沒由來的深刻異常。
小小的、小小的經驗,推著我,慢慢的、慢慢的長大了,成熟了。

我但願Bill為我高興,為我驕傲。
但願他知道他啟發了我。



離開的那一天,我分別和 Bill 和 Betty 相擁道別。
Bill 把我一把抱起來,嘆道:
「唉! 怎麼都沒增重嘛!」

誠如Betty所言,我們一生中,能去同一個地方多少次呢? 也許就是那麼一次而已。
我坐車遠去,一路上奮力的揮手。
生命中這個巧遇很美麗,Bill在我成長的過程中,成了重要的一個人。
那一幕幕愉快的相處,無聲的醫治了我。



年復一年,我都很想念他。
每次做蘋果批,我都會想起他教我做的那一天。
每逢做各樣的批與朋友分享,我都會說一遍這個觸動我心的偶遇。

謝謝Bill,謝謝你當過我生命中的天使。我無法忘記。
謹將這篇文章、這份食譜,和這個蘋果批,獻給親愛的 Bill。

這個派裡,永遠有我最窩心的記憶

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Bill懂得用最最簡單的方法,做出美味又豐富的料理。
而在他眼中,「派」就是又方便、又快捷、又好吃、又吃夠幾頓的好東西。

他做蘋果派真的十分俐落——
1. 蘋果削皮去芯切丁,隨手加糖,加水蓋過蘋果,開大火煮到蘋果變軟,然後倒掉糖水。
2. 解凍兩片冷凍千層酥皮 (frozen puff pastry)。
3. 烤盤上噴一下油,鋪一片酥皮,倒入蘋果丁,覆蓋另一片酥皮,捏緊接口,送入烤箱就成了~

我簡直覺得不可思議。

更快捷的是芝士煙肉蛋派——
1. 煙肉墊張廚房紙巾,放微波爐,「叮」至焦脆。
2. 烤盤上噴一下油,鋪一片酥皮,放入煙肉,四顆雞蛋直接打進去,隨意挑散,加幾片起司。
3. 蓋上另一片酥皮,捏緊接口,送入烤箱,又完成了~

同樣的方法還可以做N種批。
我直到現在仍很愛用急凍酥皮(frozen puff pastry),也是Bill啟發的。

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左上方兩張小圖:Bill 拿手的「芝士煙肉蛋派」(起司培根蛋派)
左下方大圖:未進烤箱的蘋果派
右上大圖烤成金黃色的蘋果派
右下方小圖之一:我在幫忙拿果醬製作「藍莓小派」
右下方小圖之二:餐桌上林林總總的「派」^^




延伸閱讀:
我想念你,Bill——手工肉丸.白酒香草番茄醬 Homemade Meatballs in White Wine Tomato Sauce

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